By Rachel Hoeing
2013 ... the year I turn 40. Gulp. In my mind I am still in my twenties. 40-year-olds are my parents' friends, not my friends, right? 40-year-olds are ... well ... old. And I am almost there.
I have tried to deny that my thirties are coming to an end, but each and every day I am somehow reminded that I truly am getting older. Don't get me wrong - there is little about my life that I would change & I am happy right where I am, but I find myself shaking my head in pity when I catch myself doing certain things. Whether you are in your 20's, 40's or 60's, I bet you can empathize with a few of my antics.
Let's see if you can relate. You Know You Are Getting Old When ...
- You get more phone calls before 8am than after 8pm.
- Most of the time when you play outside with your kids you end up hurting something on yourself.
- You think all the other moms at your child's school look way older than you. No, they don't, you just haven't taken a good look at yourself lately.
- You make a concerned or confused face. Let your face go back to normal. The wrinkles are still there.
- Your lower back is screaming in pain and you finally figure out it is because you played laser tag two days ago.
- There is an incredible party with dancing, drinking and tons of people that you are invited to attend. You happily choose to put on your PJ's and stay home instead .
- The waiter always calls you ma'am.
- You attend weddings because you are friends with the parents of the bride, not the bride.
- Half of the items on the restaurant menu are absolute no-go's because you know your stomach can't handle it.
- You make grunting noises every time you sit down after a long day.
- Most of your friends have had some sort of surgery to fix an ailing body part.
- You see a photo of yourself and the only thing you look at is the wrinkles.
- Eating dinner after 7pm is just unfathomable.
- You are now the one calling the cops on the loud party next door instead of the one attending the loud party next door.
- You are excited to crawl into bed at 9pm. (Sometimes even earlier.)
- Somehow an entire day goes by and you cannot recall one thing you did that day.
- You choose to attend the symphony over the neighborhood party on New Years Eve.
- The magazines you read have changed from People, Elle and Entertainment Weekly to Southern Living, This Old House and Time.
- You find yourself talking about the weather entirely too much.
- You find yourself talking about current events entirely too much.
- For Valentine's Day you and your spouse decide that you should purchase a new refrigerator instead of buying each other gifts.
- Your children have to show you how to work your new iPhone.
- Your go-to TV station is Lifetime or TV Land.
- You don't know anyone on MTV anymore.
- You begin dressing for comfort instead of style.
- When people talk about something that happened in the 1990's, you feel like it was yesterday but then suddenly realize it was 20 years ago!
I love to poke fun at myself and although I am getting older I know that age is a state of mind! So this week, I am going to grab life by the horns! I'm going to run around outside with the kids, go get that new stylish outfit at the boutique, attend that fabulous party and get some anti-wrinkle cream! But first I need to catch up on that Lifetime movie.