By TMoM Team Member Katie Moosbrugger
I am in no way a perfect parent, and I don’t pretend to be. But in the 10 short years I’ve been a mom, I am amazed how many common parental antics can quickly become annoying. And I’m sure there are many things I do each and every day that drive other parents crazy. It’s like a rite of passage. Once you become a parent, you inevitably acquire one or two (or maybe more) habits that make you seem like a nut job. We all know it’s not our fault. We love our kids and we’re passionate about being the best parents we can be. We just get a little deranged from time to time in doing our jobs.
After chatting with some friends, I jotted down some of our favorite pet peeves. This list literally took one day to pull together which means these annoying antics are top of mind for many! I’m guessing there are more you can add to my list. Take a read, and let me know if you can relate!
1. Be unable to carry on an adult conversation on the phone without a million interruptions from your child.
If you cannot let four consecutive words happen without a “Wait, hold on,” or a “Johnny, what is it?” or a “Mommy is on the phone right now,” or an “I’ll be right back,” or a “Just a minute,” or an “I’m sorry, what did you say?” – then you probably shouldn’t answer the phone.
2. Make sure to compare all of your baby’s milestones with other parents.
We all know your baby is the first one to sleep through the night and nap for 3 hours at least three times of day. Thanks for reminding us every time we are together.
3. Always try and one-up another mom.
“My Susie just learned her ABCs today!”
“That’s great! My Jane learned them last week, and she now knows them in Spanish and in Chinese too!”
4. Never waiver from your child’s nap schedule while on trips or vacation with friends and family.
This is especially effective if you can time it so everyone has to stop what they’re doing every day at exactly 9 am and at 1 pm.
5. Refuse to wipe your child’s nose even when thick yellow, green snot is running in streams.
6. Show up to an obvious adult-only gathering or party with kids in tow because you refuse to get a babysitter.
And make sure to come early and stay late so your kids become really tired, cranky, and high maintenance.
7. Ignore the fact your child is sick, and send her anyway to daycare, school, church, birthday parties, or anywhere there are a million other children.
I know, I know. It’s really important that you keep your schedule. The health of all the other kids – and the schedules of other parents – are not as important.
8. Insist on doing your child’s school project so it looks nothing like it was created by an elementary-aged child.
Why would a teacher want anything less, right?
9. Encourage your child to run around naked in public places.
I’m not referring to your backyard, but rather crowded public beaches or playgrounds in the summer. Little behinds are precious, especially to pedophiles.
10. Be a total germaphobe.
You pride yourself for making Bill Murray in “What About Bob” look completely unhygienic, especially with your handy-dandy super fluffy boutique-style grocery cart seat cover.
11. Tour all the preschools within a 25-mile radius and then announce to your friends (all of whom have kids in nearby preschools) that you cannot find a suitable preschool for your child.
12. Never send your child to lunch bunch, camp or other activities without first checking to be sure your child will have a friend there too.
Because it’s never a good idea for little Sammy to find himself in situation where he might have to be independent or meet a new friend.
13. Drop your child off to parties and gatherings when she is too young to for you to leave him.
Better yet, do this without ever telling the host parent or even leaving your cell phone number.
14. Be constantly late when picking up your child.
We’re all late sometimes, but we love having to constantly delay our day or rearrange our schedule so you don’t have to do the same.
15. Don’t bother to RSVP to birthday parties.
OK, we’ll try and guess your plans as we count Billy, pay for his admittance to the museum, pay for his lunch and slice of cake, and lie to our birthday child that he is probably coming. Click HERE to see why this is such a pet peeve.
16. Bring along uninvited siblings to birthday parties, and let them partake in activities, eat food, and come home with a goody bag, all which were purchased in advance based on a specific number of attendees.
17. Insist on tagging along to your child’s play date when they are old enough to go alone.
Isn’t the whole reason we organize play dates is to give ourselves extra time to get things done?
18. Ask around which teacher is good to get – or good to avoid – as if you can control the outcome.
And when teacher assignments come out, apologize to those of us you think received poor teachers for our children. That’s always a great way to start the school year. Click HERE to see why that’s not always a good idea.
19. Then get on Facebook and complain about teachers or things that have happened in the classroom.
Because, of course, none of the teachers you “friended” on Facebook will take notice of your slam or be offended when you slam their colleague.
20. Over-shelter your child and constantly move him out of classrooms, schools, teams or organizations when you think he is “uncomfortable.”
Keep doing this for years and years so when your child is ready for the “real world” in 15-20 years, he can keep coming back to you to make things right. Grit is so overrated.
21. Complain about your child to other parents.
We love being stuck in this awkward conversation because we never know if we should just blow sunshine in your ears about little Jane, or come right out and say you are spot on.
22. Belittle your child in public for not performing to your expectations.
23. Don’t bother to follow the rules of pick-up and drop-off at your school.
Oh, it must be that secret job or responsibility you have that is so important that you must drop your child in the middle of the street. Click HERE to refresh your memory about this drama.
24. Constantly gripe about how busy you are.
Ohmygoodness, I had no idea your life as a parent is so hectic. I’m sure none of us do half as much as you in a given day.
25. Be “that mom” who always offers parenting advice.
Yep, I’m guilty as charged with this blog today.
What annoys you? Comment below with other antics that drive you batty!