By Guest Blogger Carol Anne Sowell, home decorator and stager
The security and predictability a home provides children helps strengthen family relationships. Children of single parents often divide this crucial period of growth between two dwellings – Mom’s house and Dad’s house. And with the mother being named the custodial parent in most divorce cases, it can be a challenge for the father’s residency to feel equally like home.
Several years ago, my brother became a single father to his toddler daughter. He had to quickly learn the responsibilities that are often assumed by moms . . . such as how to style a three-year old’s ponytail.
It was extremely important to my brother – as I am sure it is with all dads – that his daughter feel at-ease and secure in his home. To achieve this, he would occasionally ask for decorating assistance. These conversations served as the foundation to me becoming a decorator.
Below are some techniques he utilized to make his house a family home.
Personalize Children’s Rooms
When the opportunity presents itself, allow the children to choose certain elements in their room like the theme, paint color, or furnishings. This practice can lead to feelings of connection to the home.
Additionally, special belongings such as toys, books, and pictures of family and friends that stay permanently at Dad’s can also help the house feel familiar and comfortable.
Everything in the Home has a Home
Organization in any home has been shown to lead to less stress, better sleep, and more productivity.
Everyday items around the house can keep children’s spaces organized and tidy. A mug or unique tumbler can serve as a pen and pencil holder. A shoe box wrapped in craft paper can be used as a drawer divider, an organizer for phone chargers, or storage for hair accessories. An antique wooden bowl can be a substitute for a valet tray.
One reliable way for Dad’s house to feel like home is for Dad to host childhood celebrations. Throughout the years, my brother has hosted several events in honor of his daughter, including birthday parties, a First Communion celebration, and play dates with friends.
Coordinating such events reiterates to the children, as well as to the adults involved, Dad’s capability in taking the lead in celebrating childhood milestones and planning fun experiences.
If Dad’s house has a yard, this is a wonderful place to make family memories and it requires only a few outdoor items. For instance, a firepit, chairs, and blankets can produce a delightful setting for roasting s’mores and storytelling.
A small yard can also allow for a host of outdoor family-bonding activities, such as dinner on the grill, tossing a football, or a friendly game of cornhole.
We are all aware of the advantages children gain from quality family-time, like improvement in academic performance, less behavioral problems, and greater self-confidence. When children divide their time between two family homes, they have an opportunity to receive these tremendous benefits twofold.
In the comments below, feel free to share suggestions on how you – or a single dad you know – achieve the feeling of home.
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