One of my girlfriends uttered these words to me a few years ago. She was the proud mom of three adorable boys. She loved her boys, she loved her family, but she couldn’t shake the thought of how badly she wanted a little girl.

For the next year, she and her husband read every book and article they could find on what to do to guarantee the gender of their baby. They tried some crazy ideas! They laughed at how silly some of the suggestions were, but they tried them all anyway.

In the midst of this process, she encountered a lot of ridicule from others. Many comments were thrown her way about why in the world she would try so hard just to have a girl. She heard numerous times that she should be happy with the three children she had and stop trying to control what was uncontrollable. Friends were concerned about her emotional state and how she would handle things if she were able to get pregnant, but instead have another boy.

She and her husband even considered adopting so that they could guarantee the gender of the child, but as more time went on, and her boys continued to get older, the thought of adoption seemed to fade. As more time passed, my friend soon gave up on trying to conceive at all, and as of today they still have their three adorable boys, but no girl.

I don’t think she is sad or depressed. I don’t think she feels like she has failed. I think that just every so often she wonders what it would be like to have a little girl and she sighs.

I decided to write about this topic today because I would love to hear your opinions. Are you a mom who has children of one gender and is desperately trying to get pregnant with the other? Are you a mom who thinks people are selfish for trying to conceive only to have a certain gender? I would love to hear your thoughts today, and if you have been through this, would love to hear your advice for others as well.  I just ask that your comments be respectful of others.