How We Ended Night Time Bed Wetting
By Laura Simon
Last week, after eight years and eleven months, I finally threw out my diaper genie. Leftover nighttime pull-ups were handed off to someone who could use them, and we became a fully toilet-trained house. And by toilet-trained, I mean everyone pees somewhere in the vicinity of the toilet. Fellow boy moms know what I’m talking about.
I honestly thought for a while this day would never come. Not because I have a ton of kids – I only have three, but because the holdout in the diaper category was actually my oldest child. That’s right, we finally tackled nighttime training just shy of his ninth birthday.
As you can imagine, I read a LOT about nighttime training in the last nine years, especially after his little brother achieved the milestone at 4, and even more when his little sister managed it at two. Frankly, nothing I read turned out to be true for us, which is why I want to tell you – with permission from my son – what worked for us.
But first, here’s what didn’t work:
Time. We were told repeatedly by several different pediatricians that the window for nighttime training ranges from age 3 – 8. We were completely fine with that, although I know my husband was a little worried. And there was the issue of smelly wet pull-ups, which we solved by putting a diaper genie in the bathroom. We knew the science of nighttime training and understood the chemical and genetic element. Frankly, I was a tremendous bedwetter myself, and I just wanted to make sure it wasn’t something that made my son feel ashamed. Still, it’s worth noting that he NEVER woke up dry in the pull-up, yet he’s been sleeping without one for a month now. So readiness might not necessarily mean waking up with a dry pull-up.
Bribes. I’ve heard that bribery works wonders for some kids, but it didn’t for us. I could have promised a trip to Disney World, and it wouldn’t have helped. Nighttime accidents weren’t something he was doing willfully.
Treating Constipation. This is another technique that works for a TON of kids. In fact, our pediatrician told us that something like 90% of bedwetting cases go away when chronic constipation is addressed. She suggested starting with a probiotic, which we did with no success. Since I’m not a big fan of Miralax, we chose another recommended route for treating constipation: nightly enemas. I know. Frankly, it was a lot more traumatizing for me than it was for my child. In fact, his siblings got jealous and starting asking for enemas, too. And then he mentioned that he told a church leader about them. “She just looked at me like she didn’t know what to say,” he remarked. Yes, yes, I’m sure she did.
Sleeping in Underwear or Pajamas. Several times, in response to his requests, I let him sleep without a pull-up in his normal clothes. He woke up sopping each time, and frankly, after I stripped all the sheets off his top bunk, I was ready to go back to pull-ups.
So what did work? Well, several times while we were getting ready for bed, he casually said, “Oops, I accidentally forgot and peed in my pull-up.” He was awake, mind you, and he NEVER has accidents in underwear. It was almost like there was a correlation between wearing the pull-up and instinctively going to the bathroom. I thought back to potty training, and how I trained all three kids by letting them run around naked from the waist down. After three days like that, we spent another week or two going commando, because anything that felt remotely like a diaper turned into a setback. I wondered if maybe the same thing was happening at night.
And that’s how Eli got to sleep naked. Since it was winter, so I told him he could still wear a shirt, but of course he didn’t. Anything naked is a treat. I also prepped the bed because I didn’t have the emotional resources for multiple nights of stripping that top bunk. I rolled back his normal comforter, put two ultimate crib sheets side by side right where he sleeps (a bed pad would work the same way), and gave him one super-warm, detached quilt to sleep under. That way, if he did wake up wet, I only had to wash the crib sheets and the single quilt.
The first morning, he woke up wet. We did laundry, but it wasn’t bad. The second morning, he woke up dry. We celebrated. We had a few more random wet mornings, but we were batting about 75%. We heaped a lot of praise. Eli was both proud and relieved. After three weeks, he was allowed to wear pajamas again. After four weeks, he started wearing underwear. We’re past one month dry now, and frankly, he’s forgotten it was ever an issue.
The keys, for us, were naked sleeping and making a laundry system that enabled me to keep at it.
Would this have worked a year or two ago? I don’t know. I still firmly believe that these things are always easier when the kiddo is ready, but my child gave absolutely no indication that he was ready. Clearly he was.
If you are in the same boat, add this one to your list of tricks to try. And take a deep breath. That child is not going to go to college in a pull-up. This, too, shall pass.
And if you had success with something else, please comment so that other moms can take notes!
For additional tips on this topic, visit this popular TMoM blog “How My Child Stopped Using Night Time Pull Ups.”
For even more blogs and notifications on local events and happenings, subscribe to our free weekly newsletters here.
24
0
20
20
We had the same problem and found withholding dairy products after 3-4pm did the trick. A friend told me this after years of battling the night time bed wetting.
I’m a SAH mom currently but used to work as PA in pediatric urology, where we saw a lot of children with bed wetting. Most important to note: child is not doing this on purpose n should not b punished. It can b from genetics, constipation, or decreased arousal system. Agree with treating the constipation. Avoid milk at bedtime cause it increases deep sleep. Try the bed wetting alarms. Unlike regular alarm clock, they condition the child to wake up and empty when bladder full. There r also prescription medications. Parents like to resort to them for social events like sleepovers. The pediatric urology clinic I worked at is in CLT n the doctor there is the best. I hope to go back n work for him again.
Thanks so much for sharing! That is so helpful!
So glad this worked! I truly think the child has to be ready and sometimes there are other factors in place. Our pediatrician talked about a hormone that can be really low in bed wetters. Eventually that hormone increases. My son also went through a period of EXTREME anxiety about the dark/sleeping alone/etc., so waking him to pee after taking hours of getting him to sleep was not a valid option. Once he had conquered those fears, he was ready to conquer the bedwetting! He was 11, so hold out hope Moms! What we did: I asked him if he was ready to try an alarm. He felt confident that he could be woken by the alarm and not get scared, so he was on board. We picked out the alarm together. We had maybe 1-2 successful nights with the alarm (i.e., it woke him and he went to the bathroom and stayed dry). But honestly the alarm was a pain…it would fall off, he wouldn’t hear it (sound sleeper), the batteries would die. We were too busy to deal with it. He also said that knowing that the alarm was going to go off made it hard for him to relax and go to sleep. So I suggested we just try underwear. It worked! He said it was so much better than jolting awake from the alarm. Now he consistently gets up to go on his own. He occasionally leaks a TINY bit, but nothing compared to full soaking he was before. It’s so nice to see him wearing his PJs for several days now 🙂
P.S. we used Malem wireless alarm. I think our issues were mainly user error. If you have more energy than I did you’d probably be fine!
We waited and waited and waited, but around 9 years old, he said he was ready to try something different to stop wetting the bed. My son is a very deep sleeper so our ped recommended an alarm. It has a sensor that goes in their underwear and goes off, waking them up, when it starts to get damp. It took a couple of weeks, but it trained him to wake up at that feeling instead of sleeping through. I think different things work for different kids. Just have to be willing to try until it clicks.
My parents used an alarm for me. I still remember it going off, but it did work. I actually looked on Amazon but the reviews weren’t good. What system did you use?
Look up WetStop. Alarms can get pricey. Just stick with the basic cheaper ones. They should work just as well.
My mom always said boys are harder to train with this then girls. Not sure why that would be, but am curious to know if anyone else has seen this same pattern.
I tried everything for my oldest son and finally, at my son’s 9 year old well check, his Ped said he would bet me $10 we would come back at his 10 year old check reporting no bed wetting at all. Sure enough, through that year it just stopped through nothing we tried but time. I’m convinced every kid is different and what works for you is what works!