By TMoM Team Member Dennette Bailey

This year I decided to go into 2022 with this specific purpose in mind. The entirety of my life will demonstrate a positive impact. As a result, I have developed a 73-year plan. My prayer is that I have 73 years left on this earth and so for this first of the 73 years I want my impact to reach everyone. That is a big plan I know. But I have decided to begin with the biggest of the 73-year plan because while 73 years is my plan, I acknowledge I could live much longer than another 73 years. Did you think I was going to say I could live less? For me that would not be positive. Indeed, it must be 73 years or more!

So, for 2022 I am going to share my ideas on how to make a positive impact. Today is the first of a series of blogs I plan to write on this theme, and below are five ways you can make a positive impact in your daily life.

Impact 1- Begin Your Day with Prayer and or Meditation

If you already practice a faith, you may be familiar with the sense of calmness that comes from praying. Be encouraged to make prayer or meditation a fixture in your daily life. If you are not familiar with either prayer or meditation you should know that there is scientific evidence that backs up the benefits of both prayer and meditation in providing a positive impact. These methods have been shown to promote relaxation, relieve stress and anxiety, reduce the perception of pain, and release the hormone oxytocin. I refer to Oxytocin as the natural, feel-good drug. It has the capacity to make you feel good and that good feeling can encourage you to take steps toward positive actions.

Positive Impact 2 –  Do Something Kind for Yourself

For some, being kind to themselves is not a normal occurrence. Depending on their station in life they may be accustomed to consistently doing for others. So the idea of purposely doing something for themselves is foreign. For others, they may have confused being kind to themselves with material or outside influences. Consider this kindness more about your emotional needs more so, than your physical needs.

Do more for yourself than a glass of wine (I said do more- not don’t do this), a shopping spree or night of (insert your guilty pleasure). Try complimenting yourself, believing in yourself, saying no when others expect you to say yes. Showing yourself value and respect, or giving yourself 12 minutes a day for you. I suggest you do not put all your focus on only one of these. For example, saying no and announcing your no to everyone. Instead, try all of these. Maybe for 12 minutes you need to sit at the mirror and compliment yourself and refer to yourself in the respectful ways that you would have preferred another to have referred to you throughout the day.

Impact 3 – Do Something Kind for Someone Else

Doing for others directly impacts how you see yourself, and gives you an immediate positive impact. If you want to see yourself as a kind person you must be kind to others, and if you want to receive kindness you must first give kindness. When a person says I am going to give out the same energy I have been receiving they are only hurting themselves. Unfortunately, they may believe that the energy they receive from others is at the forefront and so in turn it dictates how they react. On the contrary, you determine the energy around you by your own perceptions. The idea is to receive kindness in general, not to receive it from those to whom you have given it.

If you are kind to 5 people and none of them return the kindness but 10 other people give you kindness, would you give up the kindness from the other 10 to avoid giving kindness to the first 5?  Consider the concept in dollars. Would you give $5 to receive $10 or would you forfeit the $10 to avoid giving up the $5?  It makes sense to be kind no matter what. This can be done without debt. Your kind words when stated sincerely, and kind actions, go a long way. Acknowledging others for their contributions, complimenting others on their work, helping someone achieve a goal or if you can’t find anything nice to say or do, not saying or doing anything mean, are all expressions of kindness.

Positive Impact 4 – Build Your Self -Esteem

Make it your assignment to build yourself up. The people or person that had charge over you in your youth may not have had the skills to build you up. As a result, you may not have seen healthy self-esteem modeled. However, we live in the greatest time ever. It is a time wherein if you do not know how to do something you can literally hit a few buttons on a computer and find out how. You can Google how to build self- esteem in people who (insert your issue here). Then try doing some of those suggestions. It could be as simple as setting one goal a day and completing it.

If your self- esteem is compromised, do not give yourself a big list because you may feel bad if you do not complete it. Instead, start out with just one goal per day (other than those things that must get done). Reward yourself when you succeed. These rewards can be as modest as a kind word to yourself or a literal pat on your own back. Make a list of the things you have accomplished that you are proud of. Be sure to consider this a living list. This means it will grow, and is not a complete list of your capabilities. So try not to judge the list.

Impact 5 – End Your Day in Gratitude

Sometimes it is easy to remember the things that have not gone well or to acknowledge the things that aren’t going our way. However, this deters us from paying attention to the things that are going well. Focus on the positive and you will begin to see a positive impact more than you see the negative. You can accomplish this in many ways such as: making lists, acknowledging a gratitude aloud around a table with others, keeping a gratitude jar, having a gratitude party- to name a few. The goal is to practice being thankful and to reap the benefits of feeling good.

These methods have worked for me. There is no such thing as a guaranteed -no problem day.  However, when done consistently, these 5 methods can have an extremely positive impact on your day. These ideas require no money, so you don’t have to be rich to be successful at them. Although, you may become rich in the least physically, and at most, emotionally. Remembering what we are thankful for can encourage us to want to do and be better. It also makes me want to think about the next big impact I can make. I will share it with you in my blog next month!

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