Is the Thank You Note Dead?

Is the Thank You Note Dead? Not on My Grandma’s Watch

Hours
Comments 4 Comments

My grandmother had a huge part in my upbringing. She was 50 years my senior, and I spent more time with her than with anyone else in my family. While other kids were off doing typical teen things, I was hanging out at her house and running errands with her. She was my best friend—and because of that, I picked up a lot of what you’d call “old person habits.”

I read Reader’s Digest, watched Hee-Haw, ate dinner at 4:30 p.m., and wrote Thank You notes. Lots and lots of Thank You notes. It didn’t matter if someone gave me a pencil or a new laptop—there better be a handwritten Thank You in the mail the next day, or I was deemed ungrateful. And being ungrateful? Not on Grandma’s watch.

This “old soul” habit stuck with me into motherhood. I’ve passed the tradition along to my daughters. Whether it’s a birthday gift or a kind gesture, they know it must be acknowledged—either with a quick note or a drawing. My nine-year-old doesn’t even need to be reminded anymore. She receives something, grabs her 258 sparkly neon gel pens, and gets to work. It’s one of those parenting wins that makes me think, Grandma would be proud.

Lately, though, I’ve wondered—is the Thank You note a lost art? Can a text or a Facebook message do the job? I mean, there’s probably a meme for this by now.

After giving it some thought, I’ve decided: No, the Thank You note isn’t dead. Not in our house. Sure, there are quicker ways to say thanks, but nothing replaces that warm fuzzy feeling of opening a handwritten note. When I see my girls pause and write one, I’m reminded that Grandma gave me something special—a love for showing appreciation, in a tangible and lasting way.

So, what do you think? Do your kids write Thank You notes? Do you? Or do you go another route—texts, phone calls, shoutouts on social media?

At the end of the day, the how doesn’t matter quite as much as the fact that we’re taking the time to acknowledge those who care about us. That’s what counts.

And hey—thank YOU for taking the time to read this.

FAQs & Conversation Starters

Is it still necessary to send Thank You notes today?
No rule says you have to, but it’s always appreciated. Whether it’s a handwritten card or a heartfelt text, taking a moment to say thank you shows character and kindness.

At what age should kids start writing Thank You notes?
As soon as they can draw or scribble! A toddler’s crayon drawing is just as meaningful as a paragraph from a teen.

What are some modern ways to say thank you?

  • Text or email with a personal message
  • Voice note or short video message
  • Thank You memes or gifs (fun, but pair with something heartfelt)
  • A small return gesture or handmade gift

What if my child refuses to write them?
Make it fun! Use colorful pens, stickers, or even let them dictate while you write. Tie it into a craft session or reading time.

How do YOU show appreciation in your family?
Let’s hear it in the comments! Do you still use Thank You notes or have another tradition?

By Guest Blogger Heather Miller